Respected Italian film director, Frederico Fellini, deserves better than lackluster blonde lager tributary. Initial cabbage-like vegetal waft of palest yellow pearly-headed lightweight bodes badly. Moldy sourdough breading debunks timid lemongrass midst, bruised orange taint, and olfactory hay-barnyard astringency. Lamely watery, soapy suds.

Unpasteurized amber yellowed lager with hazy yeast clouding sustains dank grain-husked musk and astringent alcohol-burnt nature. Caramelized malt liquor frontage seeps through dry barleycorn sustenance and salted lemon souring. Sweet floral silkiness contrasts oncoming earthen hop bitterness and roasted pecan-walnut tinge.

Mediocre pale-yellowed lager lacks sufficient grain character and jaunty hop fizz, settling into watery blandness by lackluster lemony hop finish.

Middling hazy yellowed amber moderation retains soft-bubbled white head and sunny lemon dryness. Herbal tinge bedecks wheat backbone sufficiently.

Ghoulish Dracula debris lacks proper toasted grain inertia, caramel malt clearance, and perfumed floral hop aromatics. Up-front creamy resonance falters and bitter finish falls short.

Named after the Celtic harp, fine gold-toned pale lager retains barley-backed baked bread brim framing buttery malt sustenance, muted grassy hop fizz, and minimal fruit spicing maintained to smooth creamy finish. Crisp, clean, and oh so subtle. Rates higher on tap. Lesser Canadian version from “genuine Irish recipe” rates lower due to unwanted diacetyl pungency and cruder crystal malting.

Sharp hop fizz, corn malt usurpation, and tailing grain bitterness coerce lemon-lime briskness to watery finish, settling into medium-bodied oblivion.

Pungently musty toasted barleymalt aroma-palate contrasts gentle citric tang and fizzy clean-watered flow of  pale-bodied moderation. Delicate pepper-hopped orange blossom finish lacks firmness. Fine for delicate tastes or as alternative to godawful ‘lite’ beers, but too anonymous for the rest.

Soft barley undercurrent runs through well-hopped white-headed pale lager. Ample carbonation brings out creamy mocha malt luster, but lack of thick grain assertion hurts its ‘double hopped’ classification.

Don’t let inconspicuous pale tone of enchanting golden amber-hued lager (a.k.a. Closter Zell) trick you into thinking it’s weak one-dimensional fodder. Easy flowing malt whiskey sweetness and candy-coated yeast caress pick up dark fruit nuances by serene wheat finish.

Middling moderate-bodied pale lager with sweet barley-rice graining and ticklish carbolic fizz soaking up sugary malting. Predictable, simple, soapy. Serve to light pilsner enthusiasts only.

Called the ‘taste of America,’ but merely an overly familiar alternative to slushy macrobrewed pilsners. Dismal, cloy, soapy golden brown lager lacks efficient carbonation and grain punch so only indiscriminant rednecks need apply. Brewery defunct: 2006.